Journal #31- job shadowing

Where do I begin to talk about my job shadowing experience.  On Wednesday, I had the pleasure of going to the Henson Robinson Zoo in Springfield to do my job shadowing.  I went to the zoo because I someday aspire to be a marine biologist or a zoologist.  Obviously, there are not going to be many marine biologists in Central Illinois, but that's okay.  I was still really excited to go to the zoo to see all the animals and learn as much as I could from the person I was shadowing!  When I got to the zoo at around 8:15 in the morning, the snooty lady at the front desk told me and my friend, Desi Burns (who was also there shadowing for school), to follow the path down to there barn.  Our two zookeepers were there waiting for us.  We were so excited!!!!  It was a beautiful day; the sun was shining, the birds were singing, the monkeys were making their monkey sounds.....until we got to the barn.  My expectation was a friendly zookeeper who was passionate about her job, and who was also excited to have a high schooler follow her around so she could shed some of her intelligence on an ignorant teenager who may be interested in her field.  No.  We found ourselves wound up with two unfriendly ladies who told us straight up that they did not want us to be there.  It was not as bad as I probably make it sound, but I can tell you that I did not have fun.  I pictured us touring the zoo, talking about animals or interests or something, feeding them, and maybe if I was lucky she would let me hold something.  Again, this was not the case.  When I was not standing in a smelly, concrete building watching her spray animal feces off the wall and listening to her complain about her life, I was standing in another building doing absolutely nothing but watch her chop lettuce, text on her phone, and listen about how she hated every single one of her coworkers.  This lady was a real nutcase.  I learned more about her personal life than I did about the zoo, which by the way, I did not even get to walk around.  My zookeeper was lazy, cussed every other word (not a big deal, but I still felt like it was bad form), and talked bad about anyone who came in the vicinity of the tiny room I spent my day in.  Whenever Desi and her zookeeper would come around, the two ladies would stand and gossip for as long as they pleased while giving us dirty looks as if we were bothering them.  FINE WE GET IT.  You don't want us here, we know!!!  My lady literally told me: "Yeah we really don't like when we get shadowers or kids here to work with us.  They just get in the way and it's weird because we don't want to talk to them so they just watch us."  Oh okay.  I'm sorry I'm not sure if you got the memo, but I'm here for a reason.  I didn't wake up extra early and get my hopes to hear about how you have an illegal skunk living with you in your trailer.  All in all, I had a better time leaving and looking at the penguins on the way out than I did for the 2 hours I was there.

Bells For John Whitefield's Daughter- Modernism Project

http://youtu.be/ZiVLmlBbhYs

Here is the link to my Modernism Project YouTube video!! If for some reason it's not, just look up "Ainsley's Modernism Project- Bells for John Whitefield's Daughter" on YouTube.  It's just me looking really really attractive at midnight so its probs on the popular page with the most views.  Oh and my thumbnail is really hot.  Enjoy;)

Modernism...link

http://www2.iath.virginia.edu/elab/hfl0255.html

This is the link to the page that I read about modernism.  It is basically just a brief summary.

Journal 30- Beautiful Women

For this journal, I was given the opportunity to pick my favorite Walt Whitman poem from Leaves of Grass.  I did not know how to go about picking my favorite because I have not read the entire thing because it is so long.  Scrolling through the list of poem titles, I came across one that seemed "okay" at the time.  The title was "Beautiful Women," and I think I was interested in reading it because I wanted to know what Walt Whitman had to say about them, considering some of the poems I have read from Leaves of Grass.  I did not even have to read other poems to figure out that this one was my favorite.  First of all, I love how simple it is--simple, not because of how extremely short it is, but how Walt Whitman did not have to use an entire page to paint a picture in my head.  The whole poem is only two stanzas long.

"Women sit or move to and fro, some old, some young,
The young are beautiful--but the old are more beautiful than the young." (Whitman)

When I read this, I pictured a scene similar to what you would see in Gone With the Wind or something in the Antebellum South period (the Old South before the Civil War).  I imagined big, beautiful dresses with delicate details.  My first instinct was to assume that "beautiful" women meant young women, and I was surprised to read Walt Whitman's statement that the younger women were not as beautiful as the older women (Whitman).  I can definitely see it, because they do not have a naive look about them, but more an air of intelligence about them.  Everyone knows that intelligence on anyone is attractive.

I think that the main reasons I like this poem were the simplicity of it and its ability to create such a mental image with every few words...they kind of go hand in hand.  If Walt Whitman had taken the idea from "Beautiful Women" and prolonged it into a page-long story like the rest of his poems, I do not think I would have liked it as much.  There is only so much you can say, but it honestly would not have been such a nice surprise to see how small it was...and I'm really not just saying that because I did not want to take the time to read a long poem and analyze it; this was the first poem that I picked and I honestly enjoyed it.


"The Walt Whitman Archive." BEAUTIFUL WOMEN. (Leaves of Grass [1891-1892]) -. Web. 16 Apr. 2012.

Reflection- Song of Myself

I would just like to say that I absolutely love the poem "Song of Myself" by Walt Whitman.  The very first lines are "I celebrate myself, and sing myself,/ And what I assume you shall assume" (Whitman).  I need to remember that just because a poem is told in first person does not mean that it is the actual author of the poem.  I found that this poem was kind of a reflection on the speakers life or personality--the speakers "self." (Yay for making connections!!)  Okay, now I am done with first person because this is supposed to be formal writing.

The speaker definitely values nature and possibly believes that using nature can help you reflect on yourself.  "Have you reckon'd a thousand acres much?  have you reckon'd the earth much?/ Have you practis'd so long to learn to read?/ Have you felt so proud to get at the meaning of poems?" (Whitman).  Walt Whitman is saying that in order to totally learn one's "self," they must take away everything in their lives and be completely pure.  Nature is seen as being pure because it is untouched by people, and is a good thing to be influenced by.  There was also another stanza that sort of ties into this.  "There was never any more inception that there is now,/ Nor any more youth or age than there is now,/ And will never be any more perfection than there is now,/ Nor any more heaven or hell than there is now" (Whitman).  Walt Whitman is talking about how nature is perfection, which is why it is such an awesome place to self reflection.  There are no distractions to stray thoughts.  Walt Whitman could also be talking about life in general.  Right now, one will never be younger.  There was never a better time than right now.  Walt Whitman is recognizing that you only live once (YOLO), so why not live in the moment?  "Loafe with me on the grass, loose the stop from your throat,/ Not words, not music or rhyme I want, not custom or lecture, not even the best,/ Only the lull I like, the hum of your valved voice" (Whitman).  Walt Whitman just wanted to relax in the countryside with his thoughts and the opportunity to look at his life and reflect on himself.  He is telling his company that in order to fully enjoy themselves and life in general, they need to kick back and take it easy.



"The Walt Whitman Archive." SONG OF MYSELF. (Leaves of Grass [1891-1892]) -. Web. 04 Apr. 2012.

Reflection- Chanting the Square Deific

While reading "Chanting the Square Deific" by Walt Whitman, I definitely noticed things that portrayed his ideas of self and spirituality.   In a sense, I got the feeling that Walt Whitman was very full or proud of himself.

"Chanting the Square Deific" is told in first person, and Walt Whitman starts out by comparing himself to the gods by saying he is "Time, old, modern as any" (Whitman).  He says that he is relentless and will take down anyone that goes against what he believes in or what he is doing.  This may portray Walt Whitman's idea of self that says a person is an individual.  Everyone has a right to his or her thoughts.  This may also show that Whitman was a hard headed man and was the type of person that felt like he was always right.  It was either his way, or no way.  Allowing oneself to be an individual and not listen to what others is another point being made (which goes along with spirituality).  Walt Whitman must have been extremely fond of himself because he keeps referring to himself as a god ("the mightier God I am" (Whitman)) and talks about how charitable he is and how he gave up his world to help those under him.  "But my charity has no death--my wisdom dies not, neither early nor late,/ And my sweet love bequeath'd here and elsewhere never dies" (Whitman).  Basically, Walt Whitman is saying that in his godly state, he touches everywhere he goes with his kindness and generosity.  I definitely could have interpreted this wrong, but Walt Whitman really seems to feel like he is so important to society--or, at least his role in this particular poem.  Later in the poem, he refers to himself as the "general soul" (Whitman), which takes me away from that opinion a little bit.  If you are so awesome and helpful and above everyone else, why would you suddenly call yourself the same as everyone else?  I think this ties into what we discussed during class about the definition of "self."  As a singular, solitary person, you are your "self."  BUT, you influence and are very much influenced by the people around you.  Without your singluar self, there would be no groups of "selves," but without those "selves" there would be no singular self.  It is a twisted circle in our society.  Walt Whitman recognized that and found twisted, hidden ways to include it in his poetry.  What a peculiar man.

Walt Whitman uses the square of the Father, Son, Satan and Holy Spirit.  He incorporates these into his poem to describe "self."  The Son is forgiving, happy, kind and loving.  The Father is merciless, relentless, and has little remorse.  Basically, all of his decisions are final.  He makes the point to tie all of these together and compare it to how an individual is a "self," but together (as all the people in the world) we make ourselves.

"The Walt Whitman Archive." CHANTING THE SQUARE DEIFIC. (Leaves of Grass [1891-1892]) -. Web. 03 Apr. 2012.

Journal #29- self reflection

The discussion that we had today in class made me really think about the meaning of "self."  It is basically impossible to define the term self without using the word in the actual definition.  In all honesty, it is really hard for me to look at my personal self and try to "define myself."  When I look at my morals, I feel like I am the type of person who views the world through rose colored glasses--most of what I am about to say I have gathered from researching everything and anything about being a Pisces...I'm deep, man--because I always assume that something is innocent or the best it can possibly be.  I do not know if that is simply trying to see the best in things, or if I am just very naive.  I am also very modest.  When I look at the world, I so badly want everyone to see and feel what I see.  There is beauty in everything, and as the years go on I think beauty gets overlooked.  Maybe that is just the inner hippie coming out.  I definitely think I would fit in during the nineteen-sixties.  Everyone was so carefree and valued the same things that I do.  Why is it that the color of someone's skin can change the way they live or the way people look at them?  The same thing with the way someone dresses or the thoughts and ideas they have.  Why do people care?  We are all individuals.  I definitely value equality, in all aspects of life.  That goes with my belief that life is a beautiful and everyone should have the opportunity or chance to agree with me.  The same thing with war, who on earth came up with the idea of war or politics.  I am in AP US History and that is pretty much all we talk about, so I can see where politics can be structurally helpful and wars can be good...but why fighting?  Is it really worth it?  GIVE PEACE A CHANCE.

Emily Dickinson- Ainsley & Melissa

Emily Dickinson had a passion for nature. It served as the muse for a lot of her work. In “Bring Me the Sunset in a Cup”, Emily Dickinson describes her excitement when waking up on a dew covered morning. She uses a very cheery tone for the rhythm of the poem which shows the readers how positively she feels for the time of day. The rhythm of a poem can have a huge impact on the story because the reader is given a emotion without the author straight up telling them the feeling in the poem. It is a literary tool that enhances the poetry and the mood of the story. Just as one would want to know more about their idol or passion, Dickinson has questions about nature. She strives to learn more about her muse and is quick to show her curiosity over the topic. She asks, “Who leads the docile spheres withes of supple blue?” (Dickinson).
Another commonly used literary technique in “Bring Me the Sunset in a Cup” was imagery. Her words are so beautifully described that they allow the reader to picture what is taking place in the poem. In line twelve, Dickinson says, “How many trips the tortoise makes, How many cups the bee partakes” (Dickinson). The reader can picture these creatures, and ultimately get the feeling of spring. Both are outdoor animals that come out in warm weather conditions. The reader can also imagine the slow moving tortoise and hear the buzzing of the bee. Dickinson uses imagery to point out the time of day because the story sets in the morning and dawns at the end of the day. She says, “Bring me the sunset in a cup, Reckon the morning’s flagons up” (Dickinson). The comparison of a ‘sunset in a cup’ refers to the coffee that most drink in the morning, and the raising of the flag is also a job for the early morning. To inform the reader that the day is coming to a close, Dickinson says, “And shut the windows down so close, My spirit cannot see? Who’ll let me out some gala day, With implements to fly away” (Dickinson). The closing of the windows shows how the residents are in for the night. She includes her want to be free from the enclosed house, showing once again her love for the great outdoors. The greatest part of the chronological imagery is that Dickinson used items that one might not necessarily consider when thinking of a specific time of day. Raising the flag is a brilliant way to describe the morning, but it’s not what first come to mind. The closing of windows gives readers a wonderful picture to imagine. One that they probably hadn’t considered with night time before. This clever technique of hinting to the reader the time of day by using hidden imagery is what makes Emily Dickinson such a great artist of her craft. She didn’t have to state on paper every point, and instead she allowed her audience to read between the lines.

Dickinson, Emily. “Give Me the Sunset in a Cup”. The Complete Poems of Emily Dickinson. Boston: Little, Brown, 1924; Bartleby.com, 2000.

Walt Whitman's writing style

In the literary criticism I read titled "Mr. Walt Whitman" by Henry James, I did not get the impression from the beginning of the passage that the author was very fond of Walt Whitman.  He uses the word "melancholy" (James) to describe his writing style more than once.  In this particular criticism, Henry James is talking about Drum-Taps by Walt Whitman.  I have not read Drum-Taps and I never really plan on reading it, but if I was just some innocent reader who stumbled upon this literary criticism by Henry James, I honestly think I would make an effort to not read it.  Henry James believes that this work by Walt Whitman is "offensive against art" (James).  Drum-Taps takes place during the Civil War, and he thought that it was artistically safe.  Part of the passage is told from an unknown narrator and is not the words of Henry James.  The narrator describes the writing style of Walt Whitman as "prosaic" and "eclectic" (James), neither of which I fully understand the meaning of.  According to Dictionary.com, the definition of the word "eclectic" is "not following any one system...but selecting and using what are considered the best elements of all systems" (Dictionary.com).  I am already starting to like Walt Whitman because I think he and I think the same way.  Why only stick to one idea or way when there are so many others out there to consider?  It is not even just ideas, but just a general open-mindedness I guess.  The word "prosaic" means "of or having the character or form of prose rather than poetry" (Dictionary.com).  This makes sense now.  Obviously, Henry James felt like Walt Whitman was just telling a lame story about what was going on during the Civil War instead of using his poetic creativity to give the reader a better image.  To me, this does not seem very fair.  First of all, the Civil War was not a pretty place to be in.  How poetic can someone possibly get when men are dying and bleeding and freaking out all around you?  Maybe Henry James was offended because Walt Whitman's lack of proper portrayal (in the eyes of Henry James, not me!  I am totally neutral on this!) did not give the justice that the War deserved.  Just because it does not go into gory details does not mean it was a bad piece of work!  Maybe it was just boring or something!  I feel like this would have been a lot easier to talk about if I had read Drum-Taps by Walt Whitman, but I can say that I do know a lot about the Civil War thanks to AP US History.  From what I can tell from reading the literary criticism, I think that Walt Whitman's writing style must have been fairly serious.  Serious writings are more likely to be considered boring, and when people are bored they are more likely to be angry.  Henry James was probably upset he wasted his time reading something he did not enjoy.

James, Henry. "Mr. Walt Whitman." The Nation, November 16, 1865: 626. Quoted as "Mr. Walt Whitman" in Bloom, Harold, ed. Walt Whitman, Classic Critical Views. New York: Chelsea House Publishing, 2007. Bloom's Literary Reference Online. Facts On File, Inc.

"Eclectic." Dictionary.com. Dictionary.com. Web. 20 Mar. 2012.

"Prosaic." Dictionary.com. Dictionary.com. Web. 20 Mar. 2012.

Emily Dickinson's writing style

In the literary criticism that I read about Emily Dickinson, the main focus was on the dash that she makes periodically in her writings.  Although this may not fully explain the writing style of Emily Dickinson, I think it is an important enough--and interesting enough--piece that makes her so different from everyone else.  The reasoning behind these "unutterable words" (Fagan) can probably be linked to the meanings of her poems.  As Deirdre Fagan describes it, these dashes in Emily Dickinson's writings are "physical manifestations of thoughts...a thread between the sayable and the unsayable..." (Fagan).  He believes that Emily Dickinson purposely placed these dashes in her writings to break the thought of the reader, as well as show how her own thoughts might have been broken as she was writing.  If this is true, I think it is very interesting how she would think to literally portray every single little thing that was going on in her head.  It was probably done so that the reader could feel a connection of some sort to the writer, as if they could see their thoughts or think the same thoughts (which sounds a lot creepier than what I wanted it to, and for that I am sorry).  The dashes are used to "disrupt the thought pattern of the reader" (Fagan).  I do not know much about the life of Emily Dickinson--actually, I really know nothing at all--but I feel like if she was intentionally writing the dashes as strategically as they seem, her own thoughts may have been disrupted on a daily basis.  The only think I can come up with is if she had a bad home life or she was so creative that her brain was just too crowded with thoughts.  I think that happens to extremely smart or creative people.  But, in the literary criticism, Judith Farr said that she believed the "dash was the most used and abused punctuation in the Victorian Era" (Fagan).  So maybe these dashes were not as strategic or creative as I thought they were...it was just popular at the time and I am sure she was just going along with what all the other cool writers were doing.  The style of the dashes are also looked at, meaning how they appear on paper.  Because the dashes were not all exactly the same (which seems very impossible to me because no part of the handwritten language is perfect), it is possible that each dash has its own individual meaning or purpose.  To me, that seems quite unlikely.  It is impossible for ninety-nine percent of the world's population to make their letters literally exactly the same every single time they write, let alone simple dashes and marks.  I think the thing that intrigued me the most was reading how the dash was the most used character--including words--in all of her writings (Fagan).  Maybe she was just trying to have a trademark, was following the trends of the time or simply expressing her thoughts in detail, I think Emily Dickinson definitely did a good job at leaving her mark on the world...literally.


Fagan, Deirdre. "Emily Dickinson's Unutterable Word." Emily Dickinson Journal 14, no. 2 (Fall 2005): 70–75. Quoted as "Emily Dickinson's Unutterable Word" in Bloom, Harold, ed. Emily Dickinson, New Edition, Bloom's Modern Critical Views. New York: Chelsea House Publishing, 2008. Bloom's Literary Reference Online. Facts On File, Inc.

Reflection- "To Build A Fire"

For this reflection, we were supposed to read "To Build a Fire" by Jack London.  I just want to start off by saying reading this passage made me feel very cold.  That actually may be a good thing, because that means that Jack London was using a lot of good imagery and descriptions to make the reader literally feel what is going on.  It could just be cold in this room, but I thought it would make that point.  The story takes place in the Yukon,  and it is about a man and his dog who are traveling through the snow.  It is extremely cold--an amazing seventy-five degrees before zero (Glencoe Literature).  It is so cold, in fact, that the breath of both the animal and the man are literally freezing to their faces.  The man is also chewing tobacco, and this nasty spit is freezing onto his beard.  The man at first comes off as optimistic about the journey, believing that everything is okay and he will soon make it out of the extreme cold in no time.  I think he was just trying to self-motivate himself because pretty soon, he realizes he needs to start a fire and get warm if he really wants to survive.  The rest of this story makes me really sad.  The man tries his best to start a fire because he knows it will save him, but he can not keep the flame going.  "The experience was a fear such as he had never known in his life" (Glencoe Literature).  In the end, the man can never get the fire he needs going and he ends up dying.  Is that not such a horrible ending?  Jack London was a naturalist though, meaning he wrote a lot about nature and a person's relationship with nature.  This is very similar to the philosophies of Henry David Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson.  Both of these writers were transcendentalists and naturalists, and they sought solitude in nature to achieve the life they believed people needed to live.

Wilhelm, Jeffrey D., Douglas Fisher, Beverly Ann. Chin, and Jacqueline Jones. Royster. Glencoe Literature. New York: Glencoe/McGraw-Hill, 2009. Print.

Reflection- "The Darling"

For this reflection, we were supposed to read "The Darling" by Anton Chekhov.  The story starts out by talking about a young girl named Olenka.  All the people around her say that she is "such a darling" (Glencoe Literature) because of how pretty she is.  She fell in love with a man named Snookin (not to be confused with Jersey Shore's Snooki), a man who owns a theatre and gets very upset when it rains because it is ruining his business.  I felt kind of bad for Snookin at this point because it rained on their wedding day and wedding night.  How can you enjoy the best day of your life when you hate rain so much! They seem to be living happily, until one day before Easter Olenka received a telegram that her husband had died (Glencoe Literature).  Olenka was extremely sad and mourned for three months until another man came along.  He was in the lumber or timber business, and Olenka took on the role of being in the timber business as if she had never been married before (Glencoe Literature).  When her friends would suggest that she should go to the theater because she and her husband were always working, she replied by saying "Me and Vasya have no time for theaters...we are working folk, we can't be bothered with trifles" (Glencoe Literature).  Olenka, so far in the story, seems like the type of woman who does exactly what her boyfriend or husband tells her what to do.  What happened to being your own person, girl?!  Pretty soon, her second husband is dead and she already has another one within a few months.  Again, she conformed to his life as if she had lived it her whole entire life (Glencoe Literature).  As of right now, I am not really sure how "The Darling" can relate to the ideas of Emerson and Thoreau.  It may be because she was so dependent on her husbands, and Emerson and Thoreau felt very strongly about living independently.

Wilhelm, Jeffrey D., Douglas Fisher, Beverly Ann. Chin, and Jacqueline Jones. Royster. Glencoe Literature. New York: Glencoe/McGraw-Hill, 2009. Print.

Reflection- Chief Joseph

 For this reflection, we were supposed to read "I Will Fight No More Forever," a speech made my Chief Joesph.  Reading this speech, my heart broke for Chief Joseph, as well as the other Indians.  His speech was basically begging for peace.  He describes his heart as being "sick and sad" (Chief Joseph).  I was really happy that I found the website that had his speech, because right under the speech of Chief Joseph there was a little part that gave background information about why he was giving this speech.  I think that was when I really started getting sad for Chief Joseph (and plus, we just went over this stuff in AP US History, so I feel like I am some sort of expert on this time period).  As Americans--Americans being the white man--started moving west, they were taking the land that belonged to the Indians.  They did not even ask for or attempt to purchase or compromise for the land.  The Americans completely annihilated the Indians if they refused to move on to the reservations the white men made.  The reservations were on extremely undesirable land.  Anyway, Chief Joseph's tribe was located in Oregon (Chief Joseph).  Instead of moving to the reservations like the white men were trying to get them to do, Chief Joseph wanted to move his tribe to Canada.  This obviously made the white men mad because they were not doing what they were told, like they were "supposed" to.  I felt really bad for Chief Joseph because he was just trying to avoid conflict and keep his people happy.  There was no reason that the white people should have controlled what the Native American's did.  I think that is how Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau felt about the government.  They did not mind so much that is was there, like the Indians just accepted the white men were there, but they did not think they belonged all up in there business.

"Chief Joseph." Welcome to Georgia State University. Web. 05 Mar. 2012.

Reflection- Spoon River Anthology

For this reflection, we were free to pick whatever excerpts from the Spoon River Anthology by Edgar Lee Masters and compare them to the ideas and philosophies of Henry David Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson.  The first excerpt I picked titled "The Unknown" on page 124.  In this poem or passage, or whatever you want to call it, it is about a man (the unknown) who shoots a hawk in the forest.  "Ye aspiring ones, listen to the story of the unknown/ Who lies here with no stone to mark the place" (Masters 124).  By describing that there is no gravestone where he is buried, it kind of gives the reader supporting information on how the man was considered unknown.  When he shoots the bird, it does not die, but instead it has a broken wing.  The man takes the hawk home and puts it in a cage.  "Daily I search the realms of Hades/ For the soul of the hawk,/ That I may offer him think friendship/ Of one whom life wounded and caged" (Masters 124).  The man talks about how the hawk is very angry at him, and he wants to be friends with him.  If he shot him and broke his wing, why would he go to Hades (I am assuming Hell) to find his soul so they can be friends?  The hawk obviously hates him.  I mean, a strange unknown man ruined his life and threw him in a cage.  Birds are supposed to be free to fly wherever they want!  Surprising enough, I think I found ways to link this to the philosophies of Henry David Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson.  Neither Thoreau nor Emerson thought that the government should have a huge role in someone's life.  Maybe the man could be considered the government in a sense.  He took away the hawks freedom to fly--the hawk being normal people I guess--and threw him in a cage, and then tried to be friends with him.  Nothing. Makes. Sense.


Masters, Edgar Lee, and John E. Hallwas. Spoon River Anthology. Urbana: University of Illinois, 1992. Print.

Reflection- Mark Twain “The Celebrated Jumping Frogs of Calaveras County"

 For this reflection, I read "The Celebrated Jumping Frogs of Calaveras County" by Mark Twain.  The story is told in first person, and the narrator begins to tell the reader that he is trying to find information on a certain Leonidas W. Smiley.  He does not believe this man is real, but seeks out a friend of a friend to help him out.  I just found out that "The Celebrated Jumping Frogs of Calaveras County" is just an excerpt from Mark Twain's Life on the Mississippi.  I just wanted to point that out in case someone got confused as to why I was only talking about part of a story, but I really doubt whoever is reading this has read Life on the Mississippi.  He finds this friend of a friends in what seems similar to a tavern.  The man backs him into a corner, and proceeds to tell the narrator about the man that he is searching for.  Leonidas W. Smiley is a real person!  The man also tells him about a man named Jim Smiley, which really really confused me at first.  Although not very far into the excerpt of Mark Twain's Life on the Mississippi, I do not have any idea how the ideas and philosophies of the narrator have anything in common with those of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.



Wilhelm, Jeffrey D., Douglas Fisher, Beverly Ann. Chin, and Jacqueline Jones. Royster. Glencoe Literature. New York: Glencoe/McGraw-Hill, 2009. Print.

Reflection- "The Red Badge of Courage" by Stephen Crane

 For this reflection, we had to read "The Red Badge of Courage" by Stephen Crane.  The passage in our book was very short, which may be a little difficult to summarize in the amount of words required for these reflection blogs, but like I always say: when the going gets tough, the tough gets typing!  Anyway, the story starts out by comparing the man of interest to a carpenter.  "He was at task.  He was like a carpenter who has made many boxes, making still another box..." (Glencoe Literature).  I think the author made this comparison to give the reader the visual of the man working hard.  He is obviously doing something repetitive, and something that he is used to doing because he is doing it quickly.  The man is not thinking about doing his work though, and his mind drifts off every once in awhile to "jolted dreams" (Glencoe Literature).  His dreams seem a little muddled because he is so involved in the war effort.  Judging by the time period and the war effort the author is talking about, this must have taken place during the Civil War.  Plus, this small passage also talks about rifles, which if I am not mistaken were the types of guns they used in the Civil War.  Anyway, the man in the story is starting to get full of rage, and is described as "a well-meaning cow worried by dogs" (Glencoe Literature).  I think the man is worried because he is putting his entire being into the war effort and is getting nothing out of it.  Maybe, which is most likely, he is forced to be in the war effort and has no say.  This would be easier to compare to the ideas of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.  Both men did not like the situations they were in concerning the government, and stood up for what they believed in through their writings.  The man in the passage seems like he is building enough rage against what he is doing to do the same, or at least something similar.


Wilhelm, Jeffrey D., Douglas Fisher, Beverly Ann. Chin, and Jacqueline Jones. Royster. Glencoe Literature. New York: Glencoe/McGraw-Hill, 2009. Print.

Reflection- Kate Chopin's "The Awakening"

For this reflection, we were supposed to read an excerpt from the novel The Awakening by Kate Chopin.  The part of this novel in our book was very short, but I think I understand it enough to write an entire three-hundred and twenty-five word reflection.  Before the excerpt of the story, I read the "Before You Read" on realism and the life of Kate Chopin.  Kate Chopin is known for her writing because she is considered to be the first American woman who "frankly (wrote) about the suppressed passion and discontentment" of women in their confined state of their roles.  During this time--which is the Civil War time period--women had a very specific role in society.  They were supposed to be very delicate and ladylike and extremely sensitive to things like sunlight and curse words.  As I have said in previous reflections, my favorite movie in the whole wide world is Gone With the Wind.  From watching the movie so many times and from knowledge I already knew, I was able to understand The Awakening.  Kate Chopin was making the point of opening up the curtains of the sheltered woman's life and talking about how unsatisfying it really was.  Women were just expected to smile and go along with everything that their husbands.  I think that it was awesome that a woman like Kate Chopin had the guts to speak out for women.  The woman in the excerpt from her story is crying and wants to be by herself.  It seems, to the reader, that she is finally breaking down from all the stress of life.  I am sure her husband had said something sexist without knowing it (because that was normal at the time) and it was just the straw that broke the camels back.  Having a husband back then must have been horrible!  You never really married for love, and the men just expected the women to do everything and were worth nothing and had no idea about anything.  I know for a fact that I am no feminist or anything--frankly, the annoy me so much--but that would not have been fair.  I am all for equality between people, no matter race or gender.


Wilhelm, Jeffrey D., Douglas Fisher, Beverly Ann. Chin, and Jacqueline Jones. Royster. Glencoe Literature. New York: Glencoe/McGraw-Hill, 2009. Print.

Reflection- "A Wagner Matinee"

For this reflection, we were able to choose to read one of two of Willa Cather's stories: "O Pioneers!" or "A Wagner Matinee."  I chose to read "A Wagner Matinee" for no reason in particular, but I remembered that we had talked about it in class and it seemed interesting enough.  In this story, it starts out with the young man finding out that he has to pick his aunt up from the station.  I felt bad for him because of the comparison he made between he and his lifestyle, and she with hers.  The young man is taken back to a time when he was just a farm boy, and he helped her on the farm.  When his aunt finally comes off the train, he notices that she is not in a very good state.  Her skin is yellow, she is not in good shape, and she looks like she is very sick.  For a period in the story, the young man talks about the old days and how much his aunt had influenced him as a boy.  She helped him learn so many things, whether it be concerning school or life in general.  I think it was upsetting to him to see such an influential person of his life become so distant and lost.  The narrator takes her to the opera, where she finally seems to be aware of her surroundings.  So far in the story, I really have absolutely no idea how "A Wagner Matinee" is similar or different to the philosophies of Ralph Waldo Emerson or Henry David Thoreau.  The orchestra takes the young man back to all the places of his childhood; it is truly moving.  The next thing he knows, his aunt is crying.  The is pretty much the first emotion both the young man and the reader have seen from the aunt.  When everything is over and they are the only ones left in the theatre, the aunt exclaims "I don't want to go, Clark, I don't want to go!" (Cather).  This made me sad because she did not want to go home.

"Willa Cather's Short Story: A Wagner Matinee." Read Book Online: Literature Books,novels,short Stories,fiction,non-fiction, Poems,essays,plays,Pulitzer Prize, Nobel Prize. Web. 17 Feb. 2012.

Reflection- An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge

For this reflection, I read the story "An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" by Ambrose Bierce.  I actually thought it was very interesting as I kept reading, because at first I thought it was a little bit confusing.  The story starts out on a bridge (obviously Owl Creek Bridge).  There seems to be many soldiers, both in the middle of the bridge and at the very end of the bridge, and a man who is tied up with ropes.  He is standing on boards with a noose around his neck because they soldiers plan on hanging him.  I felt really bad when Ambrose Bierce was describing the man.  He seemed like an average person, and he was even described as a "gentleman" (Bierce).  As the reading went on, I did not like him so much because he was a slave owner, but I guess it is not very fair for me to judge.  It was just his way of life that he was born and raised into, so he most likely did not even understand the harm he was doing.  I got a little confused at the flashback, when he asked the Federal Scout about what would happen if someone were to be hanged on Owl Creek Bridge.  I do not think the story even mentioned what he did to get the hanging sentence.  Oh well.  Then the man must have gone through some sort of dream or something, because he goes on the fleeing journey only to be hung and killed in the end.  It was very hard for me to find a comparison between "An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge" and the philosophies of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.  The man in the story was a slave owner and literally died for what he believed in, which was the opposite of what Henry David Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson believed.  They completely opposed slavery and would have been on the side of the soldiers who killed him.
"An Occurrence At Owl Creek Bridge, by Ambrose Bierce." Page By Page Books. Read Classic Books Online, Free. Web. 17 Feb. 2012.

Reflection- "Letters to His Family" Robert E. Lee

I thought it was interesting to read "Letter's to His Family" by Robert E. Lee because he is writing this during the Civil War period in our history, which is personally my favorite time in the United States' past.  There was one sentence in Robert E. Lee's letter that really jumped out at me: "As far as I can judge by the papers, we are between as state of anarchy and civil war."  This was the sentence that made me realize that Robert E. Lee has a similar thought process as that of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.  From what I can take from the sentence from Robert E. Lee's "Letter's to His Family," he is not a very big fan of the government, or he knows that a lot of people are not.  Anarchy means that there is absolutely no government control or influence in the lives of the people.  This can relate to the philosophies of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau because neither of them really liked the government either.  It is not like they wanted anarchy--this is pretty extreme and I can not even think of a instance where this has happened--but they did not want the government sticking their nose in everyone's business when it was not necessary.  Robert E. Lee talks a lot about how he loves his country and he would do anything for it.  This does contradict with the ideas of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau though.  While they did not like their government, they did not like it because they did not like slavery.  I am going to assume that they were from the north because if you opposed slavery when you were in the south, you were basically done for.  Robert E. Lee was a general in the south and obviously fought for slavery.  His views on slavery were the exact opposite of that of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.

Reflection- "And Ain't I Woman?"

For  this reflection, we were supposed to read the poem "And Ain't I a Woman?" by Sojourner Truth.  I enjoyed reading this poem so much for many reasons.  The first reason of why I liked this poem so much was because she made so many good points.  Her story is told from the point of view of the slaves, so it is obviously during the Civil War and late eighteenth century.  During this time, the white men--particularly upper class, or high middle class--had a very specific way of treating the white, upper class women.  They were thought of to be very delicate and proper.  Sojourner Truth talks about how "a woman needs to be helped into a carriage/and lifted over ditches."  One of my favorite movies of all time is Gone With the Wind, which portrays this perfectly.  The women were thought to have to eat extremely lightly, be very sensitive to the sun, and to have the smallest waste in the country.  This is mostly for women in the South; I am not so sure about the women in the north.  At this time in our history, this was very normal and every woman was supposed to enjoy this and look forward to it once they were adults.  Soujourner Truth is asking why she, a woman, was denied the right to actually be treated like one.  This can relate to the philosophies of Henry David Thoreau and Ralph Waldo Emerson because neither men wanted slavery.  Soujourner Truth also did not slavery because it was so unfair and she was being denied of her rights.  The similarity is the extreme dislike of slavery.  Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau believed that slavery was unfair from the point of view from a white man, which does not speak as loud as the point of view from Soujourner Truth because she actually had to go through it.  They did not like the taxes that slavery caused, so I guess it is not really the exact same concept.



"Sojourner Truth's Aint I a Woman Speech!" Women Writers: A Zine. Web. 13 Feb. 2012. 

Reflection- Swing Low Sweet Chariot

The song Swing Low Sweet Chariot is a very sad song that was sung in the cotton fields by the slaves before the late eighteenth century.  This song is about the chariot of God and the heavens coming down and saving the slaves from their horrible lives on the plantations.  The slaves sang many songs in their times on the plantations for many reasons.  First of all, the songs told the stories of what the slaves were going through and all of their hopes and dreams to one day escape and live in a happier place.  Because they did not have much access to writing tools or any sort of printing and/or publishing, they past down their stories through the songs to the coming generations.  "The brightest that I can say, coming for to carry me home, when Jesus washed my sins away, coming for to carry me home" (NetHymnal).  In all honesty, there are not many ways I can link the song Sweet Low Sweet Chariot to the writings and philosophies of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau, but I think that there is one key connection.  Both Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau did not like the idea of slavery at all.  Neither of them liked their government in general and were very opinionated about it, but slavery and taxes were the main thing that these men strongly disliked.  The statement I am about to make may be the most obvious, ignorant thing I could ever possibly say in a blog post...The slaves obviously did not want to be slaves and wanted to be freed and emancipated.  The link between the ideas of the slaves and Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau is quite clearly the dislike for anything that has to do with the enslavement of African Americans, or any human for that matter since not all of them were African American.  I am starting to like Emerson and Thoreau because they did not like slavery, which is something I oppose strongly.
 NetHymnal. Web. 09 Feb. 2012.

Reflection- Cavalry Crossing a Ford

For this blog, I read Cavalry Crossing a Ford by Walt Whitman.  This was a very short story and I am honestly not for sure how this has to do with the writing of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.  I am not sure if I analyzed this correctly, but I feel like this could have several ways to interpret this.  When I read Cavalry Crossing a Ford, it took me a couple times reading it to figure out that it was talking about soldiers and a troop.  As of right now, the soldiers are just riding their horses by a creek or a river.  Their horses are resting and getting a drink.  I think they are just kind of chilling out in between battles, or maybe they are taking their time to the next battle.  If I had to guess, I would say this might be during the Civil War time because it talks about the colors of the flags.  "Scarlet and blue and snowy white."  I used this to make an extremely vague, but what I think is a very valid comparison, to the writings and philosophies of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau.  Both Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau had very strong opinions of their government.  They did not like taxes, and were extremely opposed to the idea of slavery.  The product of the Civil War was the emancipation of slaves.  Here is the thought process I used to link these very different things together: The soldiers in the passage from Walt Whitman were fighting in the Civil War--they were Confederates so they wanted to keep slavery, but that is beside the point--, which in turn ended slavery, which was exactly what Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau wanted to happen. I want to hank you for reading this to the end and not giving up on my lame ideas on this subject, which may or may not have been relevant or even made sense.

"118. Cavalry Crossing a Ford. Whitman, Walt. 1900. Leaves of Grass." Bartleby.com: Great Books Online -- Quotes, Poems, Novels, Classics and Hundreds More. Web. 09 Feb. 2012.

Reflection- The Gettysburg Address

The Gettysburg Address is such a moving speech.  Spoken by Abraham Lincoln in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania on November 19th, 1863, it was written to honor all of the soldiers who had fought and died during the gruesome battle.  The battle at Gettysburg during the Civil War was one of the worst in America's history.  During this speech, Abraham Lincoln makes the statement, "The world will little note, nor long remember what he say here, but it can never forget what they did here" (Lincoln).  Two years after this speech, Senator Charles Sumner made a comment on the Gettysburg Address that I found very comical, but also extremely fitting: "The world noted what he said, and will never cease to remember it.  The battle itself was less important than the speech" ("Gettysburg Address").  The soldiers fighting in the Civil War were not so much fighting for their freedom, as they had in the Revolutionary War, but more for their liberty and actually keeping it in the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave.  I think that Abraham Lincoln made the Gettysburg Address to honor the brave soldiers fighting for their country, but also for the cause itself.  He was speaking for the patriotism of America because he felt very strongly that it was important in keeping our country together.  Abraham Lincoln's main goal for the Civil War was to fix the Union (not so much getting rid of slavery, as everyone thinks it is).  He wanted to keep the Union together so we could literally be the UNITED States of America.  I think his philosophies can definitely be related to those of Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau because they were all big fans of America and the idea of liberty.  Sure, Abraham Lincoln's number one goal was not to abolish slavery like it was for Ralph Waldo Emerson and Henry David Thoreau, but he wanted the country to come together as one.  The similarities we can see are their love for their country and the desire to make it better with freedom and liberty.


"The Gettysburg Address by Abraham Lincoln." NetINS Showcase. Web. 07 Feb. 2012.

Reflection- The Meaning of July Fourth for the Negro

From the writing of Frederick Douglass' The Meaning of July Fourth for the Negro, the reader can really see his point of view of our founding fathers and our nation in general.  Frederick Douglass starts out to say that he can not view the men who started this country "with less than admiration" (Douglass).  As he goes on, he makes the point to give his reasons as to why he does not like the Fourth of July.  He speaks for the slaves, and says that the country had never looked so hideous except for this day.  I think he is saying that the Fourth of July was the day that "Americans" got their freedom and independence, but the "Americans" only included white people.  African Americans and slaves had absolutely no part in this new freedom.  He is asking if a man has his right to liberty, and if so, why should that exclude slaves?  The argument can be made that African Americans were robbed of their liberty and freedom because they were not thought of when America gained its independence from Britain.  The thoughts of Frederick Douglass can be compared to those of Henry David Thoreau.  Henry David Thoreau did not like his government at all.  He, along with Frederick Douglass, did not want and did not understand slavery.  He thought the government was being too aggressive in the Mexican-American war when they should have been more passive, and that slavery caused too many taxes to be put on the people.  Frederick Douglass and Henry David Thoreau can be compared by their thoughts and beliefs on slavery.  Obviously, neither of them liked it.  Frederick Douglass, having been a slave himself, did not understand why slaves were still being deprived of their freedom by a country who lived by the motto that everyone deserved liberty.  Henry Thoreau did not have the exact same point of view because he was white and clearly had never been a slave, but he still believed the act to be atrocious and blamed the government.


"Africans in America/Part 4/Frederick Douglass Speech." PBS: Public Broadcasting Service. Web. 07 Feb. 2012.

Journal #26- breaking rules

I think there are many instances in which one can break the rules and it is acceptable and morally okay.  Just a few minutes, we were talking about a specific scenario.  Say a woman just lost her job.  She does not qualify for welfare, has a small baby, and has no food in her house.  Is it morally okay for her to steal food from the grocery store for her child?  In my opinion, it is totally okay for her to steal food.  Why on earth would anyone want to penalize her for wanting and absolutely needing food for her family?  She probably was not even getting food for herself.  I think that if she was stealing something else, like clothes for herself, that would be a completely different story.  That would be a selfish act for herself and that should not be questioned on whether she should get punished or not.  I do not know if it is just because I am sypathetic for her or if I really just love babies, but if it was something that she could honestly not live without then I do not think it would be that big of a deal.  In my opinion, it is okay to break the rules if it involves some sort of unselfish act or benefits someone in a positive way.  This does not go for everything though, so if you think I am an idiot than just stop.  Obviously, if someone robs a bank for their friend it is going to benefit someone in a positive way.  Does this mean that it is morally okay for the person to rob the bank!  No way!!  There is such a fine line for when breaking the rules is acceptable or not.  I honestly think it just depends on the circumstances of the situation.  If it is for a good cause--a legitimately good cause, not anything greedy--then I think it is okay or can be looked into so that punishment is either abolished or toned down a little bit.  Here is a plan...how about no one breaks the rules.  The end.

Reflection- The Minister's Black Veil

For tonight's reflection blog, we were required to read the story The Minister's Black Veil by Nathaniel Hawthorne.  Personally, I did not think that this story was a bad as the last one.  I thought it was much better written and much more interesting to read.  I think that Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Minister's Black Veil definitely portrayed many characteristics of the Dark Romanticism time period.  One thing that was talked about in class was moral conflict.  In the story, the minister always has this black piece of crepe over the upper half of his face so that no one can see his facial features.  No one in the entire town knew what to think or why he could possibly be wearing this gloomy veil over his face.  As the story goes on and the minister's lover (I am not quite sure if they were just boyfriend and girlfriend or actually married...I got confused) says that she will refuse to see him anymore unless he tells her what the veil is all about or simply why he is wearing it, the reader can see that the ministers does not fully believe that the veil was totally his conscious decision.  He is also seeing the world with its own black veil.  He notices how his loved ones, the adults, and the children of the town avoid him and talk about him behind his back.  This could have all been fixed if he had only released the mystery of the black veil upon his head.  Another characteristic of the Dark Romanticism style of writing that is seen in Nathaniel Hawthorn's The Minister's Black Veil is the essence of gloom or darkness...hence, "Dark" Romanticism.  To the people who lay their eyes on the black crepe, the feeling of dread or sorrow overpowers them.  It is like a dark cloud is coming out from behind the veil and casting a shadow on all of the world.  The people in the story talk about how dreadful it makes the minister look, and it even seems to darken the demeanor of his sermons.  Another way that darkness or gloom could be found would be the feelings the ministers had whenever people began to shun him.  I mean, the love of his life ran out of the door because she was so overcome with dark emotions and no one will talk to him!  It is a given that he is not going to be in a happy place.  I think that the feeling of mystery and suspense could also go along with the essence of darkness in The Minister's Black Veil.  The reader really does not know the true purpose of the black crepe veil throughout the entire story.  The minister does give a few hints here and there, like when he was talking to his lady friend about how he could not take it off, but even when he is dead the veil never comes off.  The suspense behind the plot carries the story to keep the reader interested.

Journal #25- fear

In this journal, we are supposed to write about fear.  There are many ways that one can write about fear.  They can write about the actual feeling of fear, things that happen that make you feel fear, what goes on in your head when you feel fear, or things like that.  I, though, am going to go against the crowd and write about the reasons why I, Ainsley Crawford Slifer, do not feel fear.  If you did not know already, I am a superhuman.  Superhuman do not feel fear because they are supposed to have all the courage in the world so they can save the day.  I will tell you a story about a time in my life when I should have been scared, but it did not happen because clearly that is impossible.  One day, I was taking a lovely stroll through a very busy city, where crime is a day to day thing.  I was walking past the local jail when I noticed that there were some very suspicious looking men dressed in black and white striped pajamas using a cell window as an exit. "Hmm.."  I thought.  "That is not what a window is used for."  I walked over to the strange men.  "Excuse me, sirs, what do you think you are doing?"  Suddenly, they pulled a gun out of their last-season pajamas and pulled me into an alley! Any other person on the planet would have screamed, yelled out for help, and seen their lives flash before their eyes.  They may have also gotten profusely sweaty.  I did see my life flash before my eyes, but not in the before-I-die type of way.  I remembered that I was superhuman!  I may look like just your average, sixteen year old high school girl, but little did they know.  I jumped up, smacked the guns out of their hands, and hand their hands tied in knots before they even knew what was happening.  While most people get scared in scary situations like that, but I use the fear that my body creates and use my superhuman powers to transfer it into the other people.  The end.

Reflection- The Pit & the Pendulum

The story from our book, The Pit and the Pendulum by Edgar Allan Poe, was very...interesting, in my opinion.  Actually, my opinion is that I did not like it at all and it was one of the strangest things we have ever have had to read in this English class.  (Tell us how you really feel, right Ainsley?)  I am sorry, but I just needed to get that out there before I went on.  The Pit and the Pendulum by Edgar Allan Poe has very many qualities of the Dark Romanticism period.  In class, we discussed how the Dark Romanticism style of writing was similar to the regular Romanticism style of writing, but it does have its own unique qualities.  One thing that is seen in many works from the Dark Romanticism period is the setting or use of exotic places.  In this case, "exotic" places are not limited to a beach or a jungle somewhere in India (the first thing that always pops into my head when I think of the word "exotic," though I honestly have no idea if it fits the description), or someplace like that, but it can also branch into the supernatural world, Heaven, Hell, etc.  In the story The Pit and the Pendulum by Edgar Allan Poe, the narrator is slipping in and out of consciousness.  The state of unconsciousness definitely is not natural, and I think it is safe to say that it would be considered supernatural.  One was the author describes it is, "The blackness of eternal night emcompassed me."  Another thing trait of the Dark Romanticism period that is portrayed in The Pit and the Pendulum is moral crisis, or dealing with a personal problem that is internal.  The man in this story is having a problem with life and death.  He is fighting the battle with staying on this world and leaving his body to go somewhere beyond this world.  In The Pit and the Pendulum by Edgar Allan Poe, the man in the story talks about how scared he was because it seemed as if he was in between worlds.  He describes how it seemed like there was eternal darkness, but he was still able to move his limbs and feel things from the world.  It seems like he was really just unable to open his eyes, and I am almost positive he would have been able to.  Oh well.  As I said before, I did not like this story at all because it is so grim and dark and kind of scary, but I guess one plus is that no one died in the end.  I am a little tired of reading stories that involve death.  In the story's defense, though, I think I just do not really care for the writing of the Dark Romanticism period.  It is so dark, spooky, and I feel like it hardly ever gives me the feeling of happiness when I read it.  I like how it still has some of the characteristics of the regular Romanticism writing style, which includes nature and happiness, but it is like a scary version of nature.  It is a little too intense for my taste.

Journal #24- spooky spooky

For this journal, I am supposed to write about a time when I was spooked by something.  I am the type of person who is obsessed with TV shows like Ghost Hunters, Paranormal State, Ghost Adventures, etc.  I am totally fascinated with the supernatural...not in a weird way, I swear.  I am not some sort of crazy witch or psychic, medium, orator, medicine man, or anything that has to do with that.  It is just something I find very interesting.  And I promise that all of this information on is relevant because I wanted you to know this small background of my life to explain what I am about to tell whoever is reading this.  I have been on many ghost hunts throughout my life.  Like, more than I can even remember to count.  This would include haunted mansions, haunted asylums that have been abandoned, cemeteries, etc.  If it is haunted and within a four hour radius, I have probably been there.  This collection of experiences can be used to say a time when I was spooked.  It is so scary when you are in those haunted places!  When it is so dark out you can not see anything and the awareness of the usually horrible story of that particular place is magnified, it feels like every emotion of being afraid is multiplied by ten.  That is part of the thrilling part, though.  I kind of liked being scared sometimes.  I am usually not one to enjoy not knowing if or when something is going to happen--I am an AVID "planner"--but not knowing if there is actually a real spirit or ghost of whatever is so fun.  I can remember one specific time when Megan Wavering, my older sister Katie and I went to Bartinville to do a ghost hunt at an old, allegedly haunted asylum.  The stories from this asylum were horrifying; from all of the torture they did to the patients, to the conditions they were living in.  It was awful!  It was as if you could feel all of the poor souls who had suffered for so long.  It made me so sad.

Edgar Allan Poe- A Dream

For this analysis of a poem written by Edgar Allan Poe, I chose to read the poem A Dream.  There are many ways in which this poem can be used as an example for the Dark Romanticism period.  Before I further explain, I will analyze what Poe's A Dream is literally saying.  I will include the stanza, followed by my interpretation of the literal meaning.

"In visions of the dark night
        I have dreamed of joy departed-
      But a waking dream of life and light
        Hath left me broken-hearted." (Poe)



Ainsley's version: When it is dark outside, I think about happiness that has left.  I look at real life that is filled with light and makes me "broken-hearted." ...I'm honestly not sure if that is supposed to be a good thing or a bad thing based on the rest of the poem.  Edgar Allan Poe is a complicated man.  This passage shows good Dark Romanticism characteristics because of the feeling it has.  It talks about emotion, which may be good or bad, and how these emotions are effecting the author.  It also talks about dreams, and the supernatural and imagined things played a very big part in the Romanticism period.

"Ah! what is not a dream by day
        To him whose eyes are cast
      On things around him with a ray
        Turned back upon the past?" (Poe)

Ainsley's version: This is not a dream; it is real life to the man, and his eyes show that he is sorrowful(?) or some dark emotion because of something that happened to him in the past.  My guess is as good as anyones.  So far in the poem, I am getting the feeling that this is telling a story about a man who is depressed or very sad, and tends to look in the past.  Maybe there were better times then.

"That holy dream- that holy dream,
        While all the world were chiding,
      Hath cheered me as a lovely beam
        A lonely spirit guiding." (Poe)

Ainsley's version: This dream made him, a lonely, depressed being, feel happier and shed a light on him while the rest of the world was angry and scolding.  This dream must have been very important to Edgar Allan Poe.  This man was going through what the reader can assume as dreary times, but his dreams took him away from that into a much happier place. The reoccurring theme of the dream helps support the Dark Romanticism style of writing.

"What though that light, thro' storm and night,
        So trembled from afar-
      What could there be more purely bright
        In Truth's day-star?" (Poe)

Ainsley's version:  No mater how far away or dark it became, the light (shed from the dream) still shone brightly.  This could also be talking about the sun, and how the sun burns through the darkness and seems to make everything happier.  This dream or light may represent hope in this man's life when the times seemed to be at their worst.


"Edgar Allan Poe: A Dream." Poetry Lovers' Page. Web. 17 Jan. 2012.

Journal #23- scary story

Thinking about scary stories I have heard and scary movies I have seen throughout my life, I can see something they all have in common that help make them even more scary.  The most scary movies I have ever seen were The Blaire Witch Project and Paranormal Activity.  There is a reoccurring theme with both of these.  I think that both of these use suspense and "real stories" to make the audience even more afraid and get really in to the plot.  In The Blaire Witch Project, they are out in the middle of the forest.  The quality of the movie is made so it looks like the people are actually using their own home video cameras.  This adds the effect of feeling like the story was real and actually happened because it takes away the "actors" and a movie set.  When the audience is watching this movie, it will be even more frightening to believe that what is going on in the movie actually happened to real people.  I think that when things are based on true stories or have legitimate facts or proof, it makes the story much more believable.  When people believe it, they get more scared.  The same type of thing goes on in Paranormal Activity.  They main characters are using their own home video camera to make the audience feel like this was a true happening.  The lack of visual quality makes the watcher (or reader, I guess) more aware that there are "no scripts" and "no actors."  Both of these movies also use suspense.  You really do not know what is going to happen until literally the very, very end of the film.  Little things keep happening, and each one gets even worse or more intense.  The suspension is probably worse to the audience than the actual scary parts.  I would definitely recommend watching The Blaire Witch Project because it seems so realistic and I think I almost peed my pants the first time I watched it.

Journal #22

Sledding is such a glorious thing,
Something you can't do in the spring.
Only in winter, at this time of year
When the snow is falling and the air is clear.
If there is enough snow,
And, of course, enough friends,
We'll be sledding down hills
Until the day ends.
Down, down we go,
'Til it's time to go in.
We'll remember this forever,
And tell the story to our kin.
The joys of sledding
Will never be forgotten,
For the it is such a nice memory,
The opposite of rotten.
Sledding is so fun
For all the girls and boys,
We have to wear snow suits
To save our corduroys.
I will miss the winter
When spring is coming near,
Even though we have no snow,
I may shed a tear.

Journal #21- snow

Winter is one of the best seasons of the entire year.  With it's cold temperatures and icy or snowy weather, it is the perfect time of year to snuggle and drink hot chocolate.  This is especially great when there is snow on the ground.  The scenery of snow is unlike any other.  The snow is white and crisp, like the chilly winds that blow it around.  The world seems a little more quiet than usual, as if the snow is a think blanket tucking everything in.  It is such a peaceful time.  Even when the world seems very loud and hectic, the snow calms it down and makes it all better.  The peaceful and calm feeling of winter transfer into things that go on inside, instead of being strictly limited to effecting the outside.  When it is very cold and snowy outside, it is perfect to go inside, start a fire in the fireplace, and sit as you warm up while doing things like sipping on steamy hot chocolate or reading a good book.  It is the perfect season to get very cozy.  Think of how warm and snuggled you feel when you look outside your window and you see the perfect layer of snow on the ground while you are in your house feeling warm and toasty.  Because outside appears to be so peaceful and quiet, you probably also feel peaceful and quiet, like all the problems have been toned down.  The snow looks so perfect when it is untouched.  The only blemish to ruin its perfection is the footprints and trails of the small animals who are enjoying the weather.  My little sister, Lily, loves to go outside and play in the snow after a big winter storm.  When she comes inside, just about frozen to the bone, the perfect snow scene looks very different.  It is not in a bad way though, for you can see where the snow has brought someone joy and where the peacefulness has been altered.  It still holds its own beauty.